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Gail
Dines to present at Middlebury College as part of SVAM activities
-- by Deb O’Donoghue
Gail
Dines a professor, author and nationally-acclaimed lecturer will be
the keynote speaker at Middlebury College on April 9th, as part of Sexual
Violence Awareness Month. She will present a dynamic and thought-provoking
slide presentation titled, “Sexy or Sexist? Images of Women and
Men in Popular Culture"
In “Sexy or Sexist,” Dines examines how “we are bombarded
daily with media images suggesting sexual harassment is flirting, sexual
assault is foreplay and rape is hot sex.” Using examples from
magazines, ads, films, MTV and movies, Gail Dines illustrates how “images
of violence against women are so commonplace that we, as a society,
are becoming desensitized to the messages these images embody.”
She received her Ph.D. from Salford University in England. She is an
associate professor of Sociology and Women's Studies at Wheelock College
in Boston. She is also co-editor of the best-selling media textbook,
Gender, Race and Class in Media (Sage, 1995), used in over
150 colleges across the country. She is also the co-author of Pornography:
The Production and Consumption of Inequality (Routledge, 1998.)
Dr. Dines has written numerous articles on pornography, the media and
social construction of race. Her work has appeared in academic journals
and books, as well as in magazines and newspapers such as Newsweek,
Time, Working Woman, News Day, The Boston Globe, USA Today, and
Daily Mail (England). She has been a guest on numerous shows
such as The Phil Donahue Show, Sally Jesse Raphael, Entertainment
Tonight, and frequently appears on The New England Cable News Channel
and radio shows across the country.
“Sexy or Sexist: Images of
Women and Men in Popular
Culture”
Wednesday, April 9th at 7:30 pm
Bicentennial Hall, Room 220
Middlebury College
For more information about this event or other Sexual Violence Awareness
Month activities, call Deb at WomenSafe at 388-9180.
CONTENTS
Date
Rape and Drugs
--
by Adrienne Cohen, LSW, Substance Abuse Prevention
Consultant, Vermont Department of Health
Do you know what the most common date drug is? Rohypnol? GHB? No, it
is alcohol. According tot he National Institute on Alcohol
Abuse and Alcoholism approximately half of all perpetrators of sexual
assaults and rapes and half of all victims consumed alcohol at the time
of the incident. It is important to emphasize, however, that although
a woman’s alcohol consumption may place her at increased risk
of sexual assault, she is in no way responsible for the assault. The
perpetrators are legally and morally responsible.
What is it about alcohol that impacts sexual assaults? Just small amounts
of alcohol impair cognitive abilities. Judgment is impacted with the
first drink. For the perpetrator alcohol’s cognitive
impairments may enhance misperception of the woman’s friendly
cues as sexual.
Alcohol’s cognitive impairments facilitate an aggressive response
if the man feels he has been “led on.” For the victim
alcohol’s cognitive impairments reduce ability to evaluate risk.
Alcohol’s motor impairments reduce ability to resist effectively.
Other date rape drugs:
GHB is an illegal, home-made drug. It is usually sold
as a clear odorless liquid or a white powder. GHB intoxication will
lead to a deep coma-like sleep, shallow breathing, decreased blood pressure
and short-term memory loss. Use of GHB can also be fatal.
Rohypnol is a prescription drug used as a pre-surgical
muscle-relaxant and to treat insomnia. But it has not been approved
by the F.D.A. for use in the Untied States because of its potential
harmful side effects. Both of these drugs dissolve quickly and invisibly
into liquids and are being used to secretly spike people’s beverages,
causing rapid and severe intoxication, dramatically reduced inhibitions
and memory loss.
What can you do to protect yourself?
No
matter what you drink:
When
dating or going to clubs or parties:
For more information you can contact Adrienne Cohen at 388-4789 or acohen@vdh.state.vt.us
CONTENTS
Sexual
violence in the LGBTQ community: Out of another closet
--by Kimberly Balsam
Recent statistics suggest
that sexual violence is not uncommon in the lives of LGBTQ individuals.
In a large national study that I conducted with Esther Rothblum in 2001-2002,
we found alarmingly high rates of rape and sexual assault among lesbians,
gay men and bisexual men and women compared to their heterosexual siblings.
16% of lesbians and 17% of bisexual women reported that they had been
forcibly raped since age 18, compared to 8% of their heterosexual sisters.
The discrepancy was even more dramatic for the men. 11% of gay men and
13% of bisexual men reported being raped since age 18, compared to less
than 2% of heterosexual men. The vast majority of all of these rapes
were committed by men. Other forms of sexual violence, such as attempted
rape, sexual assault, and sexual coercion, were also more commonly reported
by LGBs.
Additionally, LGBs reported more experiences of sexual violence in childhood
and adolescence than their heterosexual siblings. The results of this
study add to a growing body of literature documenting the high prevalence
of sexual violence in the LGB community. Although there are no published
studies specifically focusing on transgender individuals, anecdotal
evidence suggests that they are at equally or perhaps even higher risk
of such assaults.
Why are LGBTQ individuals at greater risk for sexual violence? Given
that the majority of perpetrators of sexual violence are men, it makes
sense that queer men, who spend time in all-male environments and date
men, would be at greater risk. For women, the results are harder to
interpret. In our study, many of the queer women’s experiences
of rape occurred during early adulthood, when they were in the process
of coming out. For all LGBTQ people, the stress of living with both
external and internalized homophobia can lead to some risky behaviors,
thereby increasing vulnerability to victimization.
Additionally, all LGBTQ people are at risk of hate-motivated sexual
violence. Regardless of the reasons for its occurrence, sexual violence
often has a devastating effect on the psychological, physical and spiritual
well-being of victims. Although sexual violence is clearly a significant
problem in our community, it has unfortunately remained largely hidden
from view. In a homophobic society, LGBTQ people are reluctant to reveal
problems that could lead to further stigmatization and oppression. Given
the existence of myths about sexual violence “causing” people
to become LGBTQ, victims may be reluctant to disclose their experiences.
Furthermore, the myth that men cannot be victims makes sexual violence
particularly difficult to discuss among queer men. All of these issues
have served as barriers to recognizing, documenting, and adequately
addressing sexual violence in the LGBTQ community. It is time for sexual
violence to come out of the closet so that we can promote safety and
well-being for all LGBTQ people.
CONTENTS
V-Day
Vagina Monologues
Once again Middlebury College celebrated
V-Day with two sold out performances of The
Vagina Monologues on Friday, February 14th. The shows were
spectacular and the proceeds will benefit WomenSafe.
CONTENTS
Sexual
Violence Awareness Month Activities (SVAM)
April is Sexual Violence Awareness Month. This year’s theme,
DECIDE TO END SEXUAL VIOLENCE, calls us to take an
active role in ending sexual violence in our communities and our world.
The theme was created by members of the Sexual Violence Task Force in
Vermont and won the National Sexual Violence Resource Center’s
contest to name SVAM. The slogan will be used nationally to bring awareness
to the issue of sexual violence and encourage individuals to get involved
to end the violence.
This year WomenSafe, in collaboration with the Middlebury College Community,
the Addison County Domestic Violence Task Force and the Addison County
Sexual Assault Response Team invites community members to participate
in the wide variety of programming going on throughout the month of
April.
Some of the activities planned are:
-
Educational
films on media images, including workshops and discussion groups
-
Presentations
on the connections between sexual violence and media images by experts
in the field
-
RAD
Self Defense Course
-
Conference
for survivors of SV
Look for a SVAM calendar, posters, and
announcements in the newspaper for events. For more information, call
Deb at 388-9180.
New
Shelter for Survivors of Sexual Violence Opens
--by
Bobbi Gagne
The Sexual Assault Crisis Team (SACT) is a private, non-profit organization
that offers advocacy for female and male victims of sexual violence.
This advocacy includes emotional support, legal support, shelter support
and other services for victims of sexual violence. SACT also provides
training for professionals, schools, service groups and other public
organizations.
The Sexual Assault Crisis Team has finally reached its dream by providing
the first shelter for female and male victims of sexual violence. It
was a long struggle and took a great investment of time and money. The
board, which includes survivors of sexual violence and other community
members has worked hard to make this dream a reality.
Through the support by the Central Vermont Community and numerous grants,
SACT purchased a building in Barre and the renovations to the building
are complete. The space will house both female and male victims of all
categories of sexual violence including, but not limited to, sexual
assault, incest, sexual harassment and ritualized abuse. The shelter
will offer male victims of domestic violence a space only if local Network
Domestic Violence shelters refer them. The referral will ensure that
no batterers are sheltered.
The shelter has four rooms, each with a bed and futon to allow victims/survivors
to bring a non-offending support person to spend the night with them.
There is a common sitting area, a half bathroom and one handicap accessible
bathroom with a shower. One of the rooms is a handicapped accessible
shelter space. There is also a meeting room, training and office space.
The space is centrally located and accessible to many services.
The community has been very supportive of the project and SACT would
like to thank the many people and organizations who have donated goods,
services and monetary support. Donations of food items, paper products,
appliances, dishes and even a hospital bed were overwhelming and much
appreciated.
SACT will be having a grand opening to celebrate this milestone for
victims of sexual violence. SACT will also be offering a volunteer training
for people who wish to help provide hotline, crisis support, hospital
advocacy and shelter. For more information or to learn how you can help
call Bobbi @ (802) 476-1388.
CONTENTS
Everyday
Anti-Violence
--by
Jason Duquette-Hoffman
“We must be the Change
we wish to see.” -M.K. Gandhi
We live in a society that is perpetually at war. There is a war on poverty,
a war on drugs, a war against terrorism, even a war against domestic
violence. In his proclamation establishing October 2002 as National
Domestic Violence Awareness Month, President George W. Bush proclaimed
that our efforts can “win the battle against domestic violence.”
In a society so at war, how can we teach non-violence? When our efforts
toward justice and equality are couched in the rhetoric of violence,
itself the very mechanism of power and control that we struggle against,
how can we expect to gain ground? Violence is not restricted to the
villains; it is a part of our society, integrated into so much of our
lives.
I have been, of late, attending monthly meetings of men in our community
interested in working to end domestic violence. We have struggled repeatedly
with the seemingly overwhelming scope of the task that is before us.
How can we, as a group of five men, possibly hope to effect change in
our community and end domestic violence? Indeed, how can anyone?
The answer, I believe, is not to be found in any one program, nor in
a collection of programs. I often hear the question: “ What can
the average guy do to stop domestic violence?” Too often have
I found myself at a loss for an answer. Perhaps the words of Gandhi
can offer us some hope. If we are to be the change we wish to see, we
must have the courage to begin that change within ourselves.
Change is scary, so we can start small and build our courage from there.
Monitor the shows you like to watch. Are they about guns, violence and
killing, or do they celebrate life (hint, the Croc Hunter has far more
to teach us than we give him credit for!)? When you see your friends
on the street, do you give them a friendly punch on the shoulder or
a hug? When you are mad at your dog, do you joke that you’re “gonna
kill that stupid dog,” or do you give it a frustrated but friendly
pat on the head?
Violence finds its way insidiously into so many seemingly harmless aspects
of our lives. Taken as a whole, however, the result is overwhelming.
The next time you see your little brother, challenge him to a game of
wit, rather than a wrestling match. Let him win.
The next time someone tries to cut in front of you in traffic, let him
or her in with a smile and a wave. Offer someone your seat on the bus.
More important, tell your friends to do so as well.
Part of our commitment to ending violence must entail our relationships
with others. When we see and ignore violent behavior, we perpetuate
violence in our own lives. We must not tolerate or ignore behaviors
that are violent, oppressive and controlling. These behaviors are not
limited to hitting. Sexual harassment, coercion and assault, sexist,
racist, ageist and homophobic jokes or comments and intimidation are
all the mechanisms of violence. These we cannot ignore or tolerate if
we hope to live in non-violence. That a sexist joke was told “in
fun” does nothing to diminish the nature of the interaction, which
is based in the power and control of sexism. But by confronting it for
what it is, we can go a long way toward eliminating this violence.
When we begin to substitute understanding and compassion for anger and
aggression, and model that for others, we do more toward ending violence
than we could ever imagine. When we seriously consider and address the
ways in which we use power and control in our relationships, we start
to understand and begin to prevent violence in our relationships (physical
or otherwise). When we cease to be at war in our lives, we can finally
begin to live in peace.
Take an opportunity to attend some of the upcoming events of Sexual
Violence Awareness Month. Spend some time considering how you are at
war in your life, and start to change those things that keep you from
peace and non-violence. Not only is it empowering, it’s a great
stress reliever!
“Villains don’t fall from the skies, neither do they
pop out of the ground like evil spirits. They must be seen as symptoms
of society and therefore every citizen is responsible for their own
existence.” -- M.K. Ganhdi
CONTENTS
“I
can be changed by what happens to me. I refused to be reduced by
it.” - Maya Angelou
I
have been struggling with the idea of writing a piece for this month’s
Advocate, “Decide to End Sexual Violence.” It is
not the actual writing that I fear nor is it the obvious hurdles of
sorting, organizing, and revisiting thoughts that I have tried to put
behind me. The problem? I dislike the thought of appearing in opposition
to the always genuine, always selfless intentions of the amazing staff
at WomenSafe. I trust you will realize, by the close of this piece,
my own intentions are far from those of an antagonist. I simply speak
what I believe is true; from my own experience, from my heart, and my
hopes…and I was advised some time ago to never apologize for doing
just that.
Frankly, the theme of the newsletter perplexed me. Wouldn’t it
be fabulous if we could just “decide” to end sexual violence,
if we could somehow miraculously will it away? Trust me when I say I
would be the first in line to create such a world where we have
a choice, to “decide” to terminate sexual violence
and the evil that surrounds it. If only it were that simple…
Before you start to think me a cynic you should know this: I consciously
inhabit a world far from the miseries of pessimism. Unfortunately this
does not excuse me from reality. I do believe that in many ways we may
make a mindful effort to prevent sexual violence, through education
and awareness. The Advocate in conjunction with WomenSafe most
definitely serves such a purpose. However, to end sexual violence, something
more is needed. A broader audience must be reached. I fear that we,
as women, cannot alone decide to end sexual violence.
We can protect, educate, respect, and care for ourselves and each other,
but ultimately, who is it that dictates the decision? If we had control,
if the balance of power were in our favor these appalling acts would
not occur. If we could decide to end them, we would.
The world is far from perfect. We cannot control what is forced upon
us. What we can control is how we choose to deal…or not
deal with what happens.
I do not claim to be an expert on sexual violence nor do I possess a
degree in psychology. I am neither a therapist nor a counselor. I do
not champion male bashing. I am not fond of labels like “victim”
and “survivor.”
I am
-----a woman who has experienced<the
guilt, denial, shame, powerlessness, embarrassment, fear>sexual
assault.
I have been angry. I have been afraid. I have been hateful and disappointed,
depressed and hopeless. I have been…
Determined…to find justice,
closure and hope
----- to speak out into the silence and
speak louder than the noise<It was your fault. She was probably asking
for it. Did you see how drunk she was? She must be lying. She wanted
him. He is so nice so quiet>so sure that I
would never remember, never tell anyone
-----That I was drunk and he was beautiful,
I was young <naïve and trusting, so free, loved life…
utterly clueless> and he was
-----there. And it was
--------------perfect<he
says it was romantic it was
tender>ly wrong
I have been.
But now I am
-----I am here and I am hopeful. I am confident.
I am beautiful alive and free<no longer trapped
afraid embarrassed in my room>
------------------------------<from
the burden of shame, the arduous weight of anxious months>
---------------------------------<to
love life, love living, love>
--------------me.
I can live so happily, so certainly, so fearlessly with me<wrong
right, weak strong, fearful courageous>
I wonder…
----------Can he live with him<the judge
asked, “How do you find the defendant-guilty or not guilty?”
The jury’s reply came far too quickly “Not guilty”
I heard the man say. They cheered. They hugged. They celebrated.
He cried those tears were they real? Were they fear? Were they guilt
shame joy relief>? I will never know. But he knows<the
wrongs he has done, the lies he has told>the burden that
he must carry for the rest of his life
------ --while I carry on with my
-----life<free
--- -----------------me---
-----------------I--- ------am>
CONTENTS
Volunteer
Opportunities
Are you interested in serving your community, but not sure how? WomenSafe
is always looking for volunteers to serve on our board of directors,
answer hotline calls, attend court hearings, provide childcare, etc…
Our annual training will be held this fall right here in Middlebury!
If your desire to help is so strong you can’t wait, there are
other options for training enabling you to become a volunteer sooner!
Let this seed be planted, and give Willow a call at 388-9180 for an
application and more info. Until then, save these dates:
Volunteer Training Schedule
Monday, Sept. 29th; 5:30-8:30 pm
Tuesday, Sept. 30th; 5:30-8:30 pm
Wednesday, Oct. 1st: 5:30-8:30 pm
Saturday, Oct. 4th; 8:30-4:30 pm
Sunday, Oct. 5th; 8:30-2:30 pm
Monday, Oct. 6th; 5:30-8:30 pm
Tuesday, Oct. 7th; 5:30-8:30 pm
Wednesday, Oct. 8th; 5:30-8:30pm
CONTENTS
WomenSafe
Mother’s Day Event 2003
Please watch for our Mother’s Day event honoring local women artists.
This year we are privileged to honor the work and life of Mary Smyth
Duffy who worked tirelessly for the rights of women and was a strong
supporter of WomenSafe. Unbeknownst to many, Mary was also a wonderful
artist. We will celebrate her art on our Mother’s Day card this
year. This event is the second in a series that we hope will continue
to thrive and support women and children in our community to be free
from domestic and sexual violence.
You
can help. This year honor someone on Mother’s Day by giving a
donation to WomenSafe in her/his name. In acknowledgement of your donation,
we will send a Mother’s Day card with a beautiful painting by
Mary Smyth Duffy to the person you are celebrating. Look for a letter
from WomenSafe in your mailbox around April 25th kicking off this event.
CONTENTS
Support
Groups
Support
Groups are available for women who have experienced emotional, sexual
and /or physical abuse in a past or present relationship. Support groups
offer a chance to meet other women who have had similar experiences
and to offer support, understanding and empathy to one another. The
groups take place in a relaxed, safe atmosphere with an emphasis on
respect and support. All groups are free and confidential; childcare
is provided. Call WomenSafe for information at: 388-4205
or (800) 388-4205.
CONTENTS
Thank
Yous
Thank you to the RSVP volunteers who donate so much
of their time and energy to help with our mailing. We couldn’t
do it without them!
We would like to publicly recognize and thank our hotline volunteers
for the tireless, unconditional support they offer our agency and users
of our service. Because of WomenSafe volunteers, there is always someone
available to answer questions, offer support and make referrals to anyone
who calls our hotline after business hours. This service is invaluable
in meeting the needs of our community members. If you know a WomenSafe
hotline volunteer, thank them for a job spectacularly done!!
The
Advocate
is a quarterly newsletter. If you are interested in writing an article
or book review, or would like to respond to something you’ve read
in a past issue, please fax, email or send your masterpiece to:
WomenSafe, Inc.
PO Box 67
Middlebury, VT 05753
Fax: (802) 388-3438
Email: info@womensafe.net
Graphic
Designer: Deb O’Donoghue
Editor: Christina Grier
WomenSafe
does not necessarily share the opinions expressed by the writers in
this publication
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